I have good news from my follow-up tests. Yesterday I did a CT scan of me from the chest down to the pelvis. They injected me with contrast fluid which made my body feel warm, pooling the feeling in my nether region most, which was funny to me and apparently routine.

The results show my body has some cysts on various organs but otherwise everything is normal. I’m a cysty person so that doesn’t faze me. I may get the PCOS one checked out because it’s 3.3 centimeters but that has nothing to do with an MPN. Most importantly, my spleen and liver (the major organs of concern related to MPNs) were “unremarkable.” Yay for normal and unremarkable.

Also, my Echo and EEG came back normal last week. I told everyone who would listen that it was fitting I had cardiac tests on Valentine’s day. I am clearly still not over that joke.

In the meantime, my elusive bone marrow biopsy (BMB) slides made it to MSK and the pathologist there said:

So, just an unclassified MPN with hypereosinophilia. The molecular analysis mentioned above looked at various gene mutations and fusions and found have none of those.

Tomorrow I will go to see a pulmonologist for my shortness of breath. The appointments are all in various MSK buildings on the Upper East Side. I’ve been logging heavy subway time that is unusual for me. I usually stay most of the time in Brooklyn and transiting by bike. I could theoretically ride my bike an hour each way but I am not into doing that right now. On the subway I surrepticiously examine the people around me for clues about where they are headed or what’s their story. My internal monologe also says to that person “you have no idea I’m going to the cancer doctor and I might die from this.” I think I’m going to try to stop doing the latter mind-game.

The MSK vibe is different than the subway. The patients acknowledge each other as we ride the elevator together, sit in the waiting room, pass by eachother going to and from tests. Most acknowledge in a subtle/passive way, some more actively engaging in chit chat. I am a now part of a club that I was automatically enrolled in and did not intend to join. Club badge:

I’ve been feeling pretty great now that it’s clear my body is in good shape at the moment. Not moping around any more than I usually do. I am having some increased trouble with executive function, so my ADHD is definitely firing on all cylindars with mortality in the back of my mind. In the long run, I think being more aware of my own mortality can help me live my life more authentically in my day-to-day choices.

My next appointment with Dr. Goldberg is March 13. Before that I have a trip to Costa Rica with Javi Feb 28-March 9, conveniently planned prior to this. I am looking forward to seeing a new place, relaxing on the beach, and both processing my situation and getting away from it at the same time.

Provided I get my passport…what a tragic travesty, given my profession, that I forgot to renew my passport. I have an appointment to apply for it Feb 27 and hopefully get it issued same day. This is one of the areas I’d normally be super anxious about. Now I’m pretty whatevs, no big deal because everything’s going to work out whatever way that it does. Silver linings!